Back in the middle of August I turned 46 and decided this year I would spend my birthday paying a few local friends a visit. At a distance of course. It was a simple proactive plan and I really enjoyed the day. My first stop was to have breakfast with my long-time studio mate Emily, her fiancé Jake, and their new German Shepard pup Juniper. Yes with that name, she is as awesome and cute as you are imagining.
While conversing and eating egg sandwiches, Jake, who plays the guitar, mentioned a motto that he learned from an old teacher. I was immediately impressed by it.
“It’s better to be strong and wrong than not heard and correct.”
Now I am not a musician but these words can obviously be applied to almost anything. It gets at one of my biggest hurdles. Worrying too much about others’ judgment and potential rejection or criticism. Reminds me of how hindered people are learning a new language. I’m one of those people. We don’t want to sound stupid. But what then are we potentially missing out on?
Jake shared that when he was learning guitar, there were students who were very careful to be as perfect as possible. I totally get it and can relate. Unfortunately overthinking and feeling self-conscious hindered their energy and presence. Then there were students like Jake who eventually just went for it, made a lot of mistakes, but didn’t diminish themselves, and literally play it safe. He now applies this way of interacting with his life more broadly, and I think is very happy with the “risks taken” and the results.
This might not resonate with everyone, but it did with me. It’s another tool I can use to remind myself to quit playing small, take chances, and stop worrying so much about everyone else. They are a lot more focused on themselves than us anyway.
To take this further here are a few quotes from books that I read this year that for me enhance this sentiment.
“Make use of the time you have to be the most effective, loving, giving, adventurous, passionate, committed, understanding, successful, creative human being you can muster until you are out of time. Be authentic. Make a life that inspires you. Try something, and if it doesn’t work, try something else. Explore being alive! What is my future telling me to do right now? Act on it!”
“You don’t have to be tired. Get interested in something, get absolutely enthralled in something, throw yourself into it with abandon. Get out of yourself. Be somebody. Do something. Don’t sit around moaning about things. The more you get absorbed in something bigger than yourself the more energy you will have.”
My friend Elizabeth McQueen playing it strong and all out.